The FIVE of PENTACLES represents a tough time in the material realm. Finances, health, home, or even the physical, daily demands of a particular relationship could be wearing you out. This card reminds us to seek help from a stable resource, and try not to go at it alone.
It also might be validating that the larger systems of oppression have contributed to us being where we're at. For example, queers and trans folks are often booted from the very establishments that we were brought up with, such as our families and our churches, and harmed by anti-queer, anti-trans, anti-woman laws, and lack of protection and resources by the government. This is a good time to remember the chosen family we've created, the blood family that has stuck by us, and the resources that may be available to us, like health clinics, community centers, groups like Food Not Bombs, as well as website forums and other internet resources for folks who do not know what might be available in their area.
Wishing you all safety, comfort, nourishment, and love.
deadly ritual/battle to get his soul back 100%. The rite to get his soul back was very risky and he knew he would probably die, but without his soul, there was always a risk of the monster coming out and hurting Buffy. Remember how I said he could no longer harm humans? He was capable of hurting Buffy physically because at some point she died and was brought back to life with some pretty irresponsible magick, which made her not fully human? Was Buffy a zombie? Readers? Your thoughts? I'm sure there's plenty of discussion on the internets all about that.
So if you haven't watched Buffy the Vampire Slayer, and want to see how the Knight of Cups rolls, I suggest you watch it all the way through with your eye on Spike. It's 7 seasons, and well worth the investment of time and brain-space. If you have watched Buffy, then you know, Spike is the Knight of Cups.
With that, I will leave you with another song from "Once More With Feeling," the one and only musical episode of Buffy. Here's Spike's song, "Let Me Rest In Peace." It's hard to find good versions of video from this episode, yet I am determined to get every song from the Buffy musical episode on this blog at some point...
me to stand up. I didn't understand what she meant and was sure that there was no way up or down without seriously hurting myself. So I just kept repeating "I'm stuck, I'm stuck!" Finally she rephrased, "just straighten your legs". When I understood what she was telling me, I straightened my legs and felt so relieved (and pretty foolish) because the top of the boulder came to my waist. It was actually my position and perception that kept me in fear and unable to move ahead.
That is usually the case with the eight of swords. Going back to the image on the card, if we can get out of the terror of being trapped just enough to remind ourselves to shift our position and perception, we will often find that we are not really stuck, we just need to relax our bodies so that the bondage can loosen even more and we can wiggle our way out.
The beautiful boulders of the Sandia Mountains -
I call them Nana Tierra (Grandma Earth)
Giant Granite Boulders (c)SR Euston
The swords are thoughts, nothing else. Thoughts are our interpretation of truth. As soon as something becomes a thought, it is not entirely truth because it goes through our personal filters and perception. So this is a great opportunity to observe our own perception and filters. We have a choice not to suffer in this moment.
Try this: Deep breath. Hold your left hand on your heart and your right hand on your left cheek. Another deep breath. Close your eyes and repeat.
(Thank you don Miguel Ruiz for teaching me this beautiful exercise)
I didn't get a chance to pull a card last night and I'm feeling a little sleepy this morning, so I'm going to do a quick share today. I wrote a song back in 2000 called "Feeling 7." It was inspired by a series of tarot readings I had done, where the Chariot and other 7's were coming up a lot. There was something there about feeling stuck and afraid, maybe even paralyzed because I knew the time to act was upon me.
The outcome of this song is about surrendering and hanging on for an exciting and bumpy ride. Finally, I a little bit channeled my inner Willie Nelson when writing the song.
I often describe it as "Willie Nelson does a tarot reading."
The song was written and recorded before my voice deepened - pre-transition/pre-testosterone.
I was super lucky to have Lala Hulse on lap steel and Revi Airborne on Violin in the studio with me for this recording.